


the nights were as dark as my baby (half as beautiful too)

by bothsexuals



Category: Runaways (TV 2017)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Season 3 Spoilers, Set during S3, i think lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-22
Updated: 2020-03-09
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:35:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21903832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bothsexuals/pseuds/bothsexuals
Summary: After being possessed by a murderous alien and coming back from the dark dimension, Alex has an understandably hard time sleeping. One night he is surprised to find Chase is also restless, and even more suprised to be offered some much needed comfort by him.
Relationships: Chase Stein/Alex Wilder
Comments: 15
Kudos: 68





	1. lying awake, hardly laying peaceful

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome, everybody. This is the first fic I have ever posted and I must say I am kind of nervous.  
> At least there is basically no content for this ship so the expectations should be pretty low, right?  
> Well, I hope you enjoy this blatant fulfillment of my own wishes for Alex to be appreciated and comforted, and evidence to support my theory that he and Chase would make a great couple.
> 
> If you do enjoy it, feel free to leave kudos and/or a comment. It would make me very happy. 
> 
> Big thanks to Sib for beta-ing this for me, or whatever the technical term is. You're the best.
> 
> Title comes from As It Was by Hozier.

The hostel is dark and silent, the only sound Alex can hear is the soft whirring of his computer. Everyone else is quietly asleep in their rooms, but he is restless, as he has been since his friends brought him back, visions of prison bars and his mother haunting his thoughts. He changes positions for what must be the hundredth time and checks his watch. 3 a.m. Great. 

He tugs off the shabby blanket he’d been tangled in and gets up, reaching for his glasses in the dark and then stepping out of his room. He hadn’t expected to find Chase hunched over his fistigons at the table, hands expertly moving on the gauntlets. He clears his throat lightly so as not to startle Chase, who looks up and gives him a quick smile as Alex sits down next to him.

“Hey," he greets him.

“Hey. What are you doing up?” 

Chase shrugs, “I got an idea for the fistigons that wouldn’t let me sleep. How about you, Wilder?”

Alex sighs, lazily rubbing his eyebrows. “I haven’t really been sleeping since the whole… mom dying - alien taking over my body - trapped in the dark dimension thing.” 

“Yeah, that’ll do it.” He huffs out a tired laugh as Chase moves the fistigons out of the way, focus centering on his friend. He places a hand on his arm and purposefully meets his gaze.

“Hey," he says softly, so softly, a tone Alex had rarely heard coming from the other man, and definitely never directed at him, “if you wanna talk about it… I’m here, you know? I’ll listen.” 

Alex finds himself at loss for words, not used to being on the receiving end of such an earnest look and such a sweet declaration.

In the time he’d been back, no one had really addressed what had happened to him, other than Nico who had mostly apologized for not getting to him sooner and reminded him that she was there if he needed anything (not that he had taken her up on the offer, thinking she already had enough on her plate with the whole Morgan thing and whatever Karolina and her had going on at the moment). And he understood, really, things had been troubling for everyone, but, if only late at night, in the dark secrecy of his room, he had to admit it had been weighing pretty hard on him. But now here Chase was, looking at him with eyes full of… honesty? concern? And to his own surprise Alex found that he did want to talk about it, and with Chase of all people. 

“I… I think I do," he finally answered. 

“Now?”

“Well-” Alex gestured vaguely to the fistigons, the other’s gaze following his movements, “If you wanna finish…”

“I was basically done anyways,” Chase replied with a dismissive wave of his hand “I’ll finish up tomorrow. Or later today, technically, I guess.”

“You sound like that annoying kid at sleepovers.” 

Chase smiles brightly at him, and _oh wow._ Why does making him smile feel so good?

“I don’t know if you remember, Wilder, but I have been that annoying kid at sleepovers.”

“Oh yeah, I almost forgot. Some things never change, huh?” 

Chase gives him a look he couldn’t quite read, and bites his lower lip, still smiling. “Yeah, I guess they don’t.”

He shakes his head swiftly, as if to get rid of whatever it was he had been thinking about just then, before addressing Alex again, his tone entirely different and infinitely more casual sounding. “Should we go to your room? I mean, these chairs aren’t the most comfortable and I sleep on a very unstable hammock, so…”

“Seems like the best option, yes," Alex agrees, standing up to lead them to his room, where he sits down on the bed, waiting to be joined by Chase, who instead seems to have opted for standing and looking around awkwardly. 

“Are you just gonna stand there the whole time? Cause it’s pretty weird, dude.” 

“I- uhm, no,” Chase stutters, “I didn’t want to- you know-” 

“Just sit on the bed, Chase.” Chase lets out a shaky chuckle and sits down next to him. 

“Alright, well. What’s on your mind, Wilder?” Alex bites the inside of his cheek, looking anywhere but at the other man, trying to find something to say, but coming up empty. 

“I don’t… I don’t even know where to start. There’s so much stuff in my head, and- I keep getting these flashes...” He looks at him and shifts, feeling Chase’s intense focus on him and the words he’s stumbling his way through. “Of… things he did… I- _he_ killed someone. And it was me. I mean, the last thing that person saw before dying… It was me, Chase.” 

Chase notices that tears have formed in his friend’s eyes and desperately wants to comfort him, but nothing he can come up with seems like the appropriate thing to say, so he stays silent, and places his hand on top of Alex’s, immediately noticing how he’s trembling ever so slightly. 

“What if it’s still in me? That- that evil. Even Tandy- what she saw… I want to do good, Chase. I want to _be_ good.”

Chase turns his entire body towards Alex, leaning closer and steadily holding his gaze. “You _are_ good, Wilder. You are so good. I don’t know what Tandy saw, but I know you. Whatever that alien did, it wasn’t you. And it’s gone now.”

“But it was gone in the dark dimension, too, and I still-” 

“You were tortured in the dark dimension. And we let that happen for way longer than we should have. Whatever you did…” He shakes his head and looks down, and Alex thinks he might feel guilty. “We should have come for you sooner. We shouldn’t have let that happen to you.” 

“I get why you had to, Chase. It’s okay.” 

“But it’s not okay. You-” he glances up at Alex again, his eyes full of remorse “-you can’t sleep.”

His voice sounds small, and it reminds Alex of the kid he once knew. He knows him again now, tough not as he did then. But he understands what he really means and neither of them talks out loud of the grief he is now burdened with. They don’t need to.

“Yeah, well,” he mutters, “you’re helping.” 

Chase tentatively smiles. “By being so boring that you’re falling asleep?” 

“Exactly. You’re like a human sleeping pill.” Chase playfully punches his shoulder and they laugh gingerly, until Chase’s laugh turns into a deep yawn. 

“You should sleep, Chase. I’ll be okay.” Chase looks at him for a few seconds, searching his eyes for any hints of a lie, and stands up once seemingly satisfied. 

“If you need me-” “I know where to find you,” Alex grins, “the bad hammock.” 

“Exactly,” Chase confirms with a genuine smile, then starts to walk away. 

He turns back just before exiting the room. “Goodnight, Wilder,” he says in a gentle almost-whisper.

“Goodnight,” Alex replies, matching his tone.

Once Chase is gone, he lies down again feeling lighter, and sleep finds him somewhat easily.


	2. my heart is thrilled by the still of your hand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chase and Alex confront some more trauma and things get gayer along the way.

Their late night talks have become something of a habit.

At first Alex had done most of the talking, telling Chase about his time in the dark dimension or as a vessel for a murderous alien, then Chase had started talking as well; he started telling Alex about how leaving his mother in the algorithm had been both heartwarming and heartbreaking, about his father, things he had never told anyone before. Alex can’t help but marvel at how quickly their friendship had blossomed and their trust in each other had grown.

The shift in their dynamic is apparent to everyone, the two have never been closer or more in sync, and yet the reason behind it is a mystery to everyone but them. Which is not to say that they have been hiding their late night hang-outs, they just happen to be the only ones awake in those moments and is it really so wrong to want to have something that is only theirs?

They have a bit of a ritual, a nightly dance only they know the steps to.

Once everyone else has gone to bed and the hostel is almost completely dark and silent, Chase tiptoes his way to Alex’s room and sits next to him on the bed where they talk and talk and talk until one of them (usually Chase) starts yawning and the other persuades him to go to sleep.

The way Chase sits a little closer to him each time does not escape Alex, but he says nothing; he wouldn’t want to drive him away. In fact, the warmth that Chase emanates calms and comforts him more than anything else had managed to do since the night they ran away, and he finds himself wanting to move even closer, to be enveloped by it. 

Each night Chase leaves, but that feeling remains, lulling him to sleep and filling his dreams with memories of their childhood, like the time Alex had skinned his knee as they played outside and Chase had bandaged his wound and held him as he sobbed. Chase has started caring for him again now, nursing to his newer wounds, the scars Alex feels deep inside himself, the cuts he fears have irreversibly blemished his heart. His friend’s attitude towards him has shifted, his words don’t have the same bite they’ve had for years; the resentment Alex had grown used to hearing in his voice has disappeared, replaced by a fond teasing he hadn’t realized he’d been missing quite so much. 

Tonight they’re sitting on his bed once again, their thighs just barely touching. Chase had been talking but he’d fallen silent a few minutes ago; he fidgets nervously with his hands in his lap as Alex patiently waits for him to speak again.

“I…” he starts, and Alex immediately turns, aiming all his attention at him, “you remember when… I left?” Alex nods simply and Chase continues, his voice small and shaky.

“My father- well, the alien inside him, I guess- he told me he was sick. And… he had been… nice to me… sweet even. Like… a dad, you know?” He pauses again and looks down at his hands with a sad smile. Alex moves a hand towards his, slowly, giving him the time to move away in case the gesture is unwelcome. But Chase doesn’t move, instead he lets it reach him and holds it firmly between his own, like an anchor that’s keeping him from floating away.

“I didn’t want to lose him before I ever got that. I wanted to know what it was like to be a family… I still do. And he gives me hope sometimes, but then he’ll blow up at me out of nowhere. I just… I can’t please him. But despite how much he hurt me I can’t help but want to.”

Nodding, Alex sets his other hand on top of Chase’s and starts drawing small, soothing circles on his skin with his thumb.

“I didn’t want to betray you. I just… wanted to have a family, I guess.” He shrugs, as if saying something unimportant, but Alex knows that's not the case, he knows that in the last few nights his friend had trusted him with things he’d never revealed to anyone else, secrets he’d buried deep, refusing to admit them even to himself. He’s honoured to be trusted with this, to be the one Chase chose to confide in. 

“You do have a family.” He speaks softly, his eyes fixed on Chase, despite the latter’s avoidance to meet his gaze. “We may be a little messed up, but we care about you. _I_ care about you.” He pauses for a beat, waiting for his words to sink in. When Chase looks up and finally returns his stare he continues, “I don’t blame you for leaving. I’m so sorry for what he did to you.” 

Chase lets out a shaky breath and drops his gaze again; he’s trying not to cry, Alex realizes. Squeezing Chase’s hands with both of his he whispers, “It’s okay,” and he means so much. 

_It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to hurt. It’s okay to lean on me as you did when we were kids._

__

__

_As you let me lean on you._

His breath hitches when Chase's head drops to his shoulder and he hears him start to quietly weep.

They stay that way, in an almost-silence, if not for Chase’s muffled sobs, Alex still comfortingly rubbing his thumb over Chase’s hands. They stay that way until Chase’s sobs become more scarce and finally stop, until his breaths become slower and calmer, and Alex realizes his friend is starting to doze off. 

“Hey,” Chase’s eyes flutter open and he looks a little lost and already half-asleep (and admittedly kind of adorable). “Lie down,” Alex mumbles, guiding his friend until his head is resting on the pillow, then lies down next to him.

It’s not the most comfortable fit: both of them are laying on their sides, facing each other, with so very little space between them, but he cannot banish his friend to that stupid broken hammock now, and he really doesn’t want to. 

Feeling both at ease and incredibly nervous in the current situation, he closes his eyes and tries to even out his breaths. He’s on the edge of slumber when suddenly he feels Chase’s hand move to rest on top of his, where it's laying between their bodies. For the second time that night, his breath hitches because of an unexpected touch from the other man. Nonetheless, he keeps his cool and, eyes still closed, intertwines his fingers with Chase’s, hoping he hasn’t crossed some sort of unspoken boundary, that this isn’t too intimate- his worrying stops when Chase’s grip tightens almost imperceptibly. 

When he wakes up early the next morning he is greeted by Chase’s drowsy smile, and he cannot deny the way his heart flutters at the sight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter! If you did, please leave kudos and/or a comment as feedback is always very appreciated and makes me as soft as Chase's smile makes Alex.


	3. nothing but you

It has been three nights since Chase slept in Alex's bed for the first time. 

He’s been doing the same every night since. 

They never explicitly mean for it to happen, it’s not a scheduled moment of their nighttime talks; but since that night Alex has stopped urging Chase to go to his room once he gets perceptibly sleepy and has instead taken to telling him to lay down, he can sleep there if he wants to (and Chase always wants to). 

No one seems to have noticed, or if they did, they haven’t said anything. Alex is grateful for that. He’s not ready to address whatever this is, nor does he think that Chase is. All he knows is that he has been resting better with Chase’s hand in his own, his breath lulling him to sleep and his sweet smile to wake up to. He can’t think about what that means yet, doesn't want to risk messing up the only real comfort he’s gotten since the night he ran away from everything he knew. 

Chase is in his bed again tonight, of course. He’d told him about his father again, and Alex had held his hand as he cried, and he’d let him lean on his shoulder as he drifted out of consciousness. He had wanted to move closer, to do more, but he was too scared. Scared of what, he couldn’t quite pinpoint. Now Chase is soundly asleep while Alex lies on his back, trying to calm his own ragged breathing. He keeps his eyes wide open: if he closed them he would be right back in that prison, his mother bleeding out at his feet, the walls closing in, the room getting darker and smaller and- he sits up abruptly as a strangled sob escapes his throat. His heart feels like it’s beating out of his chest and he can’t catch his breath and- 

“Hey, hey, Alex. It’s okay.” A voice. A hand on his arm, another drawing gentle circles on his back. “Breathe with me.” And then the voice is counting for him, guiding him through each breath. 

“Good, that’s good. Okay, can you open your eyes for me?” He hadn’t realized he’d closed them. He blinks them open and his vision is filled by Chase’s own eyes, looking at him with concern. 

“Can you tell me what you see?” 

Alex looks around, trying to focus on his surroundings. “The bed. My computer.” He turns his gaze to Chase again. “You.” 

“Okay, and what can you feel?” 

“Uh, the blanket. Air on my face. Your hand on my back. Feels nice.” _God, why did he say that last part?_

“Alright, and what do you hear?” 

“Just your voice.” 

Chase gives him a lopsided smile. “Sorry about that. Feel better?”

“Yeah. You’re good at that.” He breathes. 

“No need to sound so surprised, Wilder,” Chase points out with a light chuckle. 

Alex manages a small laugh. “Sorry I woke you up.” 

“Don’t be. I’m glad you did.” Seeing his friend’s quizzical look he clarifies, “I don’t want you having to deal with this alone.” 

Alex bites his lip and looks down, not knowing what to say. He looks up again when he feels Chase’s hand on his shoulder.

“What do you need?” Chase asks with a tone that could only be described as tender. 

It takes Alex by surprise. He had expected Chase to ask what had happened in his dream, or whether he wanted to talk about it. But he supposes Chase already knows what he is haunted by. He knows about what had happened in the dark dimension, what he'd been made to do; he knows about the flashes he gets of his time as an alien vessel, too vivid and real to be dreams. He doesn't ask what it had been this time. Instead, he asks what Alex needs. And Alex has no idea what to reply. 

He knows what he needs. He needs to know that he won't become like his parents, that he won't lose himself to the darkness, won't lose himself at all. He needs to feel like that kid again, the one Chase affectionately called a nerd whenever he got lost in a rant about Star Wars, or his newest video-game obsession. He needs someone to care that he's breaking, losing himself piece by piece. He needs someone to hold him together. He knows what he needs. He feels it deep within himself, burning an awful hole in his chest. 

But he cannot voice this feeling, this excruciating sensation that has barely left him since his return. He says the words over and over in his head, shouts them and begs them to allow him to tell the other man. He opens his mouth to speak, but the words get stuck in his throat and again he feels like he's suffocating. So he sits there wordlessly, and he thinks Chase will grow tired of his silence, of him, and whatever this was between them will be over, his only comfort will be gone.

He feels a movement beside him and he thinks Chase is going to get up and leave and _please,_ he tells himself, _just say something, anything, don't let him go._ But Chase doesn’t leave. Instead, he moves to sit in front of Alex on the bed, so close that their knees are touching. He leans towards him, slowly enough that Alex could move away if he wanted to. He doesn’t.

Chase’s arms come around him swiftly, one holding him so close that their chests are flush against each other, the other stopping when it reaches his neck. Fingers tangle themselves in his hair and stroke so softly and soothingly that Alex's eyes flutter close and his entire body relaxes. He brings his own arms around his friend and instinctively nuzzles his head in his neck and breathes in, and suddenly Chase is all he feels.

Chase’s familiar smell filling his lungs with every breath he takes, Chase’s steady breaths guiding his own, Chase’s delicate hands caressing him… Chase, his friend, his comfort, holding him together, enveloping him and filling his senses, reassuring him that he’s not alone, not anymore. 

He doesn’t know how long they stay that way; minutes maybe, or perhaps it was hours. He wouldn’t mind if it was forever.

“Did you think I forgot?” Chase whispers at one point, and Alex knows he’s smiling even though he can’t see him; he hears it in his voice and feels it where Chase’s cheek is resting against his head.

“What?” he asks in the same tone.

“That you’re a hugger,” Chase replies easily. 

Alex laughs at his friend’s remark, then laughs a little bit longer when it hits him just how good it feels to be with him like this.

When he feels sleep start to come again, he raises his head and nods slightly towards the pillow. The two of them move as one as they lay down on their sides, Chase’s chest against Alex’s back, an arm around his waist still anchoring him and holding him close. He feels Chase’s warm breath on his neck and it makes him shiver for just a second; he touches Chase’s hand with his own and thinks he feels _him_ shiver. 

He doesn’t know whether it’s real or a dream when he feels a quick, almost unnoticeable kiss be pressed to his hair, and hears what is probably his new favorite voice wish him goodnight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took a little long to write and publish because bitches be busy and needing to have their computer fixed... I'm bitches. Anyways, I really loved writing it, despite its being a bit more of a challenge compared to the others. I hope you enjoyed it, and if you did please leave some kudos and/or a comment because one kudos and/or comment equals one very happy author.


	4. honey, just put your sweet lips on my lips

Alex looks at his watch for what feels like the hundredth time. 

Usually, Chase would be in his room by now, but tonight he hasn’t shown up. 

He knew this would happen. He knew Chase would eventually grow tired of him, and yet he let himself grow more and more attached to the point that Chase is always on his mind. He’s the first person Alex wants to go to whenever something happens, the one that every small thing reminds him of. He occupies his thoughts in a way that both fascinates and terrifies Alex.

He recognizes the feeling. He’s tried to deny it, repress it, but it keeps growing and growing and he’s powerless against it. He wants to be around Chase all the time, needs to be close to him. He finds every excuse to be near him and casually touch him in the day, and he feels at peace when night comes and he can finally be in his arms, and finally be able to breathe. 

He’s felt a similar longing before; he’s felt it for Nico, for Livvie, but something is different this time. What he feels for Chase goes deeper; there’s a trust and an honesty there that he’s never shared with anyone before, and he cherishes it more than words can say. That’s why it really stings that Chase still hasn’t shown up. 

He’s torn. He doesn’t know whether he should stay in his room, try to sleep alone for the first time in weeks and act like nothing happened (which it didn’t, and that’s the issue, isn’t it?) or whether he should go up to Chase’s room and… he doesn’t know what he would do then. He doesn’t know what he would do if Chase told him to leave, if he ended this… bond they share. He doesn’t know whether it would be better to remain in this limbo, not knowing where they stand, or to be sure that there’s nothing between them anymore. Or even worse, there never was.

Maybe he shouldn’t worry this much, he thinks. After all, only a couple hours have passed; maybe Chase just got held up doing something and he’ll show up soon. Or maybe he won’t show up at all. Maybe he made a mistake by letting Chase see all of him, maybe that drove him away, too. 

He needs to know, he decides. He needs to know if he’s messed up something good and beautiful again. He needs to just go and ask him. Get it over with.

Feeling heavy, he stands and walks up the stairs until he’s in front of Chase’s door. He knocks twice, quickly and almost too softly.

“Yeah?” he hears Chase call from inside the room.

He opens the door slowly to find him sitting in the hammock, not looking like he had been doing anything. He leans against the doorframe and wills away his anxiety, doing his very best to look and sound casual. “You bailing on me, Stein?”

“No- I mean… I don’t… I don’t know,” Chase stammers.

Alex immediately lets go of his cool façade as concern fills him. He steps in, closing the door behind him. “Did I do something?” he asks urgently.

“No. No, you didn’t do anything wrong, I just-” he pauses and Alex waits for him to find his words, trying quieten his own nerves. He doesn’t want to pressure or rush Chase, but _God, this is killing him._ Chase looks down, seeming sad. 

“I don’t know,” he says, “I’m sorry.”

“For what? You didn’t do anything wrong,” Alex tries to reassure him, but Chase shakes his head.

“I did, though,” he murmurs. 

“What did you do?” Alex asks, wishing his tone hadn’t been so tense.

“I-” Chase starts, then stops right away, as if some invisible force is preventing him from saying anything else. 

Alex tries to wait again; he lets a minute pass in silence, and then another, and another, until he can’t bear it any longer. He needs this to be over, needs Chase to just tell him that he doesn’t want anything to do with him anymore so Alex’s heart can properly break and he can start to move on. 

“Chase, please,” he begs, hating how desperate he sounds, “just tell me to leave and I will. Tell me you don’t want to do-” he gestures vaguely between the two of them, unable to find the right words “-this and I’ll go. I’ll leave you alone. You just have to tell me.”

He feels his chest heave and his eyes well up with tears and he wants to kick himself for having let his guard down, for having allowed himself to feel this way again, to feel more than he ever had, only to get hurt once more.

“You won’t even tell me?” he continues when Chase still hasn’t spoken, “Fuck, Chase, I’ll just go.” 

Chase stands up suddenly and is in front of him before Alex can even begin to move.

“No,” he says in that low voice of his, the one that Alex can’t help but love. His hand rests on Alex’s arm, as if holding him in place. 

“Don’t go,” he pleads, and Alex never wants to leave him.

“Tell me,” he whispers, eyes not leaving Chase’s.

“Tell me,” He repeats, growing more confident with every second. He brings a hand up to Chase’s cheek and Chase leans into the touch, closing his eyes and letting out a relieved breath. He opens his eyes again after a few seconds and finally speaks. 

“You make me feel safe.” Alex bites back a small smile and nods, a sign for him to continue. “I didn’t mean for this to happen. I didn’t mean to fa- ...to feel this way. But you, Alex… God, you’re amazing. How could I not?” He takes a deep breath. “I’m sorry I worried you tonight. I just- I can’t keep... sleeping in your bed, and… not when I feel this way.” He closes his eyes, breathes in, out, and opens them again. “I’m sorry, I’ll- I’ll stop. It would be wrong of me to continue… when you don’t, you know, feel… the same.”

“Chase,” Alex calls over his rambling, but he doesn’t seem to notice.

“Chase,” he says again, firmer and a touch louder, and this time Chase falls silent and looks at him with wide eyes. “Stop rambling.” He takes one step forward, so they’re mere millimetres apart, and tenderly brings his other hand to Chase’s other cheek, holding his gaze surely.

“I do feel the same,” he whispers.

“You do?” Chase asks, smiling in disbelief.

“I do,” he repeats, beaming back at him.

They’ve both leaned closer, he realizes, then glances down at Chase’s lips for a moment, noticing how easy it would be to close the remaining distance between them. He looks up again and sees Chase’s eyes still fixed on him. He bites his lip and _fuck it,_ he decides, _just go for it._

“Can I-” he starts, but Chase interrupts him before he can finish the question. 

“Yes. Yes, please,” Chase whispers, and Alex complies, leaning in the rest of the way to put his lips on Chase’s.

They kiss slowly, tentatively, and it’s the most amazing thing Alex has ever felt. And judging by the quiet hum of pleasure that just escaped Chase’s throat, he thinks he doesn’t find it too bad either. He puts all of himself in the kiss, all the words he can’t yet say, the feelings he doesn’t quite know how to voice, he translates them into the moving of his mouth, and the stroking of his thumb on Chase's cheek, and he hopes Chase hears them somehow.

They stop kissing after he has no idea how long. Could be seconds, minutes, hours and he couldn’t care less. All that matters is Chase, the way he feels for Chase, and the fact that Chase feels the same. 

“Wow,” Chase breathes, letting his forehead rest against Alex’s, “that was…”

“Yeah,” Alex agrees, unable to tear his eyes away from the other’s mouth.

“Wanna do it again?” Chase asks with a grin.

“Yeah,” Alex repeats, and then Chase is putting an arm around his waist to bring him closer and then they’re kissing again, both of them unable to stop smiling and laughing into it, and it’s messy, and joyful, and absolutely perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading this chapter! I'm sorry it took so long for me to post this, but I am currently super duper busy and wrote this while I was very tired so I hope it doesn't suck. I hope you enjoyed it and, as usual, please leave kudos and/or a comment if you did.


	5. soothe me daily

A few weeks after their first kiss, no one appears to have noticed the romantic turn Alex and Chase’s relationship has taken. Not that they’ve been trying to hide it, not at all. Of course they haven’t gone crazy on the PDA, but they have been sitting or standing as close as possible at every meeting, their latest plans have all been a shared effort, Chase has basically moved into Alex’s room and he seems to have made a point of grabbing Alex’s hand at every given chance. 

There was also that one instance where Alex had cleverly hacked a Wizard server and Chase had commented on how it was “very sexy of you to be this smart, Wilder”, but that had seemed to fly under the radar as well. 

Frankly, Alex and Chase aren’t sure whether their friends haven’t noticed anything, or whether they have but have decided not to say anything about it. They don’t worry about it much, content as they are in their new relationship. 

The inevitable reveal happens on an unusually tranquil afternoon. Chase is sitting on the hostel’s worn-out couch, drawing up some new projects on his notebook, while Alex lays with his head on his boyfriend’s lap, quietly reading an old book he had found in a dusty drawer. Having reached the end of the chapter, he places his bookmark (a small piece of paper on which Chase had drawn a cartoony version of the two of them- and no, he does not care how cheesy that is) on the next page and closes the book.

“I’m gonna get some water,” he announces as he stands up, “you want anything?” 

“Water, please,” Chase replies, looking up with a pout that Alex has come to recognize as his ’please kiss me goodbye even though you’re only leaving for two seconds’ pout. 

Always happy to oblige, he leans down and presses a soft kiss to Chase’s lips. He pulls back and, after a beat, starts to lean back in because, well, Chase looks very cute and the water can wait another minute, really. But before their lips can touch again they’re startled by a very loud voice coming from across the room. 

“HOLY SHIT!” 

Alex turns to see Molly standing with her hands over her mouth and sits back down with a sigh. _This might take a while._

“Molly, don’t say shit!” comes Gert’s voice from a nearby room.

“Sorry, Gert!” Molly yells back, then focuses on her two friends who are sitting on the couch, “What were you doing?” 

“What did it look like we were doing, Molls?” Alex quips with an amused grin. 

“Well, Alexander,” she answers solemnly, “it looked like the two of you were kissing. Smooching, even.” 

“That’s exactly what we were doing,” Alex confirms at the same time as a baffled Chase mutters, “Smooching?!”.

“Are you two _together_?! How did I not know this? Does everyone else know this? I’m calling a meeting.”

“Molly, there does not need to be a meeting,” Chase uselessly says .

“A meeting about what?” comes Nico’s voice from behind Molly, and at once all their gazes zero in on her and Karolina standing in the doorway.

“Oh, great! More people!” Alex comments, voice dripping with sarcasm, then sighs, “I just wanted some water.”

“I know, babe.” Chase soothes him with a gentle hand on his back and Alex can’t help but smile, giving up his annoyed façade.

“Babe?” Karolina repeats, eyebrows raised.

“Yeah!” Molly exclaims before either of them can say anything, “They’re together! Gert, come here!” she calls out and Gert almost immediately appears in the doorway. “They’re dating!” Molly tells her, excitedly pointing towards Alex and Chase.

“Cool. Good for you,” she comments and walks away as the boys mumble their thanks. 

“I can’t believe you guys are actually together,” Nico remarks, “I just thought you were like, best buddies with subtly homoerotic undertones.”

“Well,” Chase counters, “turns out they’re more like decidedly homoerotic overtones.”

“Is that a thing?” Alex asks with a laugh, and Chase turns towards him and _swoons_..

“I don’t know. I’m making it a thing,” he answers, joining in the laughter.

“Alright, you’re the boss,” Alex concedes playfully 

“You guys are _adorable_ ,” chirps Molly, startling the two into remembering the fact that they aren’t alone anymore, and in fact have a handful of spectators to their dorky flirting.

“Right.” Alex stands up once again and clears his throat. “I’m gonna go get some water.” 

“We’re not done with this.” Molly stage-whispers to Chase, who replies with a chuckle, “I would expect nothing less”, then she leaves the room followed by Karolina and Nico. 

Alex walks to the kitchen and smiles to himself as he fills a glass with water. As awkward as that was, he can’t deny how giddy it made him feel to let everyone know that he and Chase are together. 

He starts to fill up a second glass. Now that everyone knows, it all feels more official. He is Chase’s boyfriend, and _oh wow_. He cannot believe how happy that title makes him. 

“Alex,” he hears Nico call from behind him and turns towards her, his smile unfaltering. 

“What’s up?” 

“You and Chase,” she starts, then pauses, and Alex waits for her to find her words. “You’re happy, right?” she finally asks.

“I am,” he replies softly, “happiest I’ve ever been.” 

“Guess that says a lot, considering you’re a teenage runaway living in an old underground mansion,” she jokes with a stiff laugh. 

“Yeah, I guess so,” he chuckles, then, to reassure his nervous-looking friend, continues, "I really am happy, Nico. He gets me. He makes me feel safe, and he… he’s very good at reminding me who I am when I feel a bit… lost.”

She puts a hand on his arm and gives him an honest smile. “Well, then. I’m happy for you, Alex.” 

He answers by taking a step towards her and enveloping her into a hug. She returns the gesture and smiles into his shoulder. They separate after a few moments and Alex gives her another smile before heading back to his boyfriend, who was serenely waiting for him on the couch. 

“Hey,” he greets Alex as he sits and hands him the glass of water. 

Chase thanks him but puts the glass aside, instead taking Alex’s hand in his and intertwining their fingers. 

“You good?” he asks sweetly, bringing his other arm around his boyfriend’s shoulders and pulling him closer to place a soft kiss on his head.

“Yeah,” Alex beams, closing his eyes and relaxing into the embrace, “I’m great.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well. Here it is. Last chapter. Kind of an epilogue, really, which is why the tone is almost completely different from the rest of the chapters but hey, they deserve some good fun, too. If you enjoyed this please let me know by leaving kudos and/or a comment, and thank you for sticking to the end!


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